Sunday, April 19, 2015

What You NEED to Know About Comfort Food

Ever wonder, "Why food?" 

Dr. Nina explains WHY you use food to cope and she tells you exactly what you need to do to change. Watch now!





COMING SOON!  My new 30 Day Challenge:  Kick The Diet Habit.

Sign up now and you'll be on the VIP List, and be the first to receive my FREE 3 Day Video Training: Crack The Code Of Emotional Eating (available May 2nd). 

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Friday, April 17, 2015

How The "F" Word Affects Your Weight

I am a big fan of the "F" word.

It's not what you might think.  It's not "fat" or "food" (and it's not the other "F" word, either!).  I'm talking about this word:

Feelings

Part of what makes us all human is our ability to feel emotions, so having emotions is part of what makes us feel truly alive.  However, we live in a culture that tells us there's something wrong with our feelings.

Angry?  You have an anger management problem.

Sad?  Take an anti-depressant. 

Anxious?  There's a pill for that, too.

Scared?  Be strong!  Fight!  Don't give in to fear!

Happy?  You might be a bit too happy.  Hypomanic, maybe?

No wonder people often have difficulty recognizing that emotions, needs, desires and reactions are part of being human, not a defect.  A feeling is a reaction to a situation, not a reflection of your character. 

When you cannot identify or process uncomfortable or intolerable feelings, because the mere existence of those feelings is viewed as weak, bad or wrong, you may turn to food as a way of dealing with those feelings.  

Food can't take away feelings.  As counterintuitive as it may sound, the only way to actually get rid of feelings is to actually feel them.    

Check out these three common feelings:

1) ANGER: Annoyance, frustration, rage and fury are all derivatives of anger.  It helps to make a gauge of what you're feeling.  On a scale of 1-10, what's a 10?  Rage?  Fury? 

What's a 2?  Frustration?  Annoyance?  

If you don't gauge your feelings, every emotion seems like a 10.  Everything feels like too much.  And if your feelings are overwhelming, you're more vulnerable to turning to food (or from it) for relief.

Check in with yourself about your conflict over anger by finishing these sentences.

I don't like getting angry because:

I'm afraid to feel angry because it reminds me of:

2)  SADNESS:  Gloomy, unhappy, glum, hurt, dejected, depressed, grieving, are all forms of sadness. 

I don't like feeling sad because:

I'm afraid to feel sad because it reminds me of:

3)  HAPPINESS: You might be thinking, "Happiness is a good thing.  All I want is to be happy! "

Some people are afraid of being "too" happy, fearful that the rug will be pulled out from under them.  They are afraid they'll lose that good feeling, so they sabotage themselves.  

Food is also associated with celebration and reward.  We commemorate birthdays, achievements and transitions food and allow ourselves a "treat" for a job well done.  If food is associated with special celebrations, it's difficult not to eat or overeat on those occasions.

I'll know when I'm happy when:

If I let myself be happy, then:

When you can identify, gauge, and process a range of emotions, you won't need food to escape, numb or distract yourself from them.

And that's how you make peace with food!

Here's a video on this topic:




COMING SOON!  My new 30 Day Challenge:  Kick The Diet Habit.

Sign up now and you'll be on the VIP List, and be the first to receive my FREE 3 Day Video Training: Crack The Code Of Emotional Eating (available May 2nd). 

Don't miss out!  Click HERE now!








Friday, April 3, 2015

Do You Think People Are Judging You? Here's What To Do...

When you walk into a room filled with strangers, what are your initial thoughts?

Do you think the best?   All these people are interested in me and can't wait to meet me!

Or the worst?   Everyone thinks I'm fat... boring... stupid.

Sometimes these judgmental thoughts are automatic, as in the following examples:

  • Alyssa sat on the couch in my office, telling me about her weekend "stay-cation" of watching movies at home.   As I listened,  she suddenly stopped talking and sighed, saying, "You're right, I should have done some work this weekend.  I can't believe how lazy I am."
  •  Corinne wept in frustration as she described a recent problem at work.  She blew her nose and shook her head, apologetically.  "You probably think I'm such a crybaby."
  • My friend Bettina and I had dinner recently, and she ordered dessert.  She gave me a sheepish look.  "I know what you're thinking.  I have no business eating tiramisu.
They thought they knew what I was thinking.   They were wrong!

Each of these people  projected her own critical thoughts about themselves onto me.   Why?  

Alyssa's father was a workaholic and accused her of being a slacker.  She thought I was viewing her through her father's eyes. 

Corinne grew up in a family that did not tolerate emotions or tears, which were viewed as signs of weakness.  She imagined that I was viewing her tears contemptuously. 

Bettina's mother constantly monitored her weight, and Bettina thought I was doing so, too.

Those fears can make you want to isolate from other people, leaving you vulnerable to using food in any one of the following ways:   to fill an emptiness, to be a friend, for comfort, numbness, and escape.  

Here's some "food for thought" to consider:

What do you think others are thinking about you?   Are they critical?  Kind?  Indifferent?  Angry?

Who viewed you that way in the past?   How are those thoughts familiar?

What is another way to view yourself and the situation?  What would you say to someone else in your position?   

 
Here's what I was ACTUALLY thinking, by the way, about Alyssa, Corinne and Bettina:

It's important to relax over the weekend and recharge your batteries.
It's healthy to cry if you're upset.
It's okay to eat dessert, or anything, in moderation

Don't be a mind reader! ('cause you're probably not really psychic!)

When you think the worst, you feel terrible, and may eat to cope.  

When you believe others are interested in you, you feel less anxious/upset/guarded and are therefore less likely to turn to food.

That's how you make peace with food!

COMING SOON!  My new 30 Day Challenge:  Kick The Diet Habit.

Sign up now and you'll be on the VIP List, and be the first to receive my FREE 3 Day Video Training: Crack The Code Of Emotional Eating (available May 2nd). 

Don't miss out!  Click HERE now!


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SIGN UP NOW & I'll send you a FREE blueprint: 25 Ways To Cope (Without Food).  

https://dr-nina.leadpages.net/cope-without-food/

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Sunday, March 15, 2015

Do You Find This Pretty Annoying?

If you're sick of people telling you that you have "such a pretty face" and if you just lost weight, you'd be dating up a storm, then watch this video! 


If your relationship to food is causing you pain, whether it's bingeing, bingeing and purging, or restricting, there is a reason.  That reason may be out of awareness but it is still impacting you.  


When you figure out what lies beneath, you can take steps to address those underlying emotions and conflicts ('cause it's not just about emotions!!) and take steps to change.


Dr. Nina helps you win the diet war by making peace with yourself.









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Thursday, March 12, 2015

Behind The Billboard: One model's confession about what's really going on

Today's guest post is from Briauna Mariah.  Here's her inspiring story and her revolutionary mission:
"I was never one of those girls who "always" wanted to be a fashion or runway model. It was suggested to me when I stopped growing and realized I was 5'11" and slender. I thought it would be a good way to pay for college. I never thought modeling would change my life, but it has.
I still remember hearing my first agency booker tell me, "You are a product, so don't take what I say as personal." It's impossible not to take it personal when someone tells you, "You have too much baby fat, come back in 6 months." I was 15 years old with a BMI of 18!
Every aspect of a model's skin, hair, curves, walk...is constantly criticized. She is never good enough. As a society, our beauty standards in the fashion world are warped. They are completely unrealistic. Yet, young girls are expected to conform. This is what it feels like to be a model. Moldable.
Being represented by an agency has always been a stressful experience for me. I was always pressured one way or another, bullied strategically, bossed around, and strung along for months along waiting for my paychecks. At one point, I weighed 123 pounds (at 5'11") and was still being told to lose more weight. "You'll never be an international model unless your waist is smaller!" My waist was 23" at the time.  
Sadly, the experience is the same for so many women. Young girls losing too much weight is too often celebrated! This perpetuates and encourages eating disorders among young girls across the globe.
Once I realized how much damage I was doing to my body, I kept wondering when things would change. 
Everyone talks about it. People complain about the unrealistic images painted by the glossy campaigns, the high end runway shows and photos so edited they hardly resemble the actual model. 

The damage to the models themselves is only a fraction of the problem. The media creates this expectation of perfection. Our kids see this and can't stop wondering, "why don't I look like that?"
Shouldn’t something be done about the way models are being exploited? 

Shouldn’t someone, somewhere do something instead of just talking about it? 
I realized if I wanted to see change, I had to take action myself. I decided to create a modeling agency to promote positive change, diversity and health.

Changing the way media portrays women will help eliminate the root of many eating disorders, self-esteem issues and even social bullying. Promoting health as the new standard will create positive images we can be proud to have our kids aspire to."





Briauna is the founder of We Speak, a modeling agency designed from the ground up to empower and protect models, give designers and consumers a choice to make a difference, plus create an advertising culture we can be proud to have the next generation look up to. 

Learn how you can help support revolutionary change by visiting: 

For more information:  917-274-7324

---------------------------------------

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SIGN UP NOW & I'll send you a FREE blueprint: 25 Ways To Cope (Without Food).  

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Saturday, March 7, 2015

How To Get Rid Of Feelings

Ever wish you could just be DONE with painful, difficult, upsetting emotions?

You can't eat them away, starve them away, purge them, let them go or ignore them.  There's only one way to get rid of feelings.  WATCH NOW to and find our how!





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Thursday, March 5, 2015

Hope Appears In The Distance

   
Today's guest blog is written by a survivor of sexual and emotional abuse who wishes to remain anonymous.  Her story illustrates how victims of abuse often enact the abuse they suffered from others on their own bodies.   Today, she is battling to feel whole, to feel lovable, to stop the abuser-abused cycle.  As her title suggests, there is hope on the horizon.  Note: some descriptions may be triggering 


           " If my mom ever found out I was writing this and essentially telling the world our dirty family secret, I believe I would be disowned. If her husband ever found out, I would be killed. I’m sure you think I am exaggerating, but by the time you finish reading this, you will believe me.

So why would I want to share my story and risk so much? I believe that it is important to own our stories. And by sharing our stories with others, perhaps we can find purpose in our pain. Maybe my story will encourage someone to reach out for help. And if I can help one person by telling my story, it is worth the risk.

I thought I was fat when I was a toddler, and by the time I was six, I refused to sit on anyone’s lap. I was terrified that I would somehow break them. So, although I believe the abuse played a significant role in my eating disorder, I cannot say that it was the total reason for it.

My mom remarried when I was about nine or ten. Almost immediately he began making weird comments, trying to touch my chest, and sleeping naked with his bedroom door open. I didn’t quite understand what was happening. When I found money all over my bedroom the next morning, I thought something magical had happened. What kid doesn’t like finding money?

But then it happened. I can’t say I remember everything that happened. The abuse happened in one form or another until Easter 2011. I was watching TV. It was a school night. He started touching my legs. I froze. What was happening? What was about to happen? I knew it wasn’t right, but I couldn’t scream or move or do anything. I was terrified. Then he moved my underwear to the side. I was so scared I couldn’t move.

After he was done, he went to my mom and confessed what he had done.    Instead of my mom being angry at him, she told me to pack my bags. She sent me to stay with my aunt and uncle for a few days. So many people knew what had happened. No one did anything about it.

During this time, I began starving myself. I thought that if I looked like a little girl, he wouldn’t want to touch me anymore. When I did eat, I would purge. I would restrict until I passed out. I tried so hard to make my body disappear. I thought that as I got older, I would learn to accept my body, so the purging and restricting wasn’t a big deal.

Except now it has been over twenty years of purging, bingeing, abusing diet pills and laxatives, etc. I continue to abuse my body. I have picked up where he left off. I’m not sure why I feel like I deserve to be miserable. I push people away who try to help.

When you’ve been abused, it’s really hard to trust people. And when no one cared about your wellbeing as a child, why on earth would anyone care about you now that you’re an adult? And maybe I don’t deserve for people to care. Maybe I don’t feel like I am good enough to have people love me or care about me. But I’m trying.

It’s a battle every single day, but if I give up, then they win.  I can’t let that happen. And if I give up, who will tell my story? Who will help the kids who are falling through the cracks of the system? 

I believe I have my story so that I can help others, and I can’t help anyone if I give up.
  
Hope appears in the distance
Childhood stolen
Innocence lost
Your selfish needs met
At any cost

Nightmares begin
Afraid to fall asleep
No one can know
The secrets I keep

Broken and torn
Shattered into pieces
He’s the monster under the bed
The nightmare never ceases

Cutting and starving
Trying to disappear
No one comes to help me
Why am I even here?

The silent screams for help
The tears I’m not allowed to cry
People know and remain silent
I just want to die

Resurrection of my soul
My story finally spoken
No longer wishing to die
No longer feeling broken
-Becca"
Becca recently earned her Masters Degree lives with her dog, Charlie, somewhere in the United States.  You can follow her blog, Broken Pieces:  My Journey To Freedom.

________________________________________________________________________________

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