Saturday, April 21, 2012

Mirror, mirror...



Mirror, mirror on the wall…
Who’s the fairest one of all?

Ever look at yourself in the mirror and think you look okay, even good - but five minutes later your image in the same mirror seems distorted and huge?

Is what you’re seeing in the mirror reality?  Or is it a reflection of an inner conflict?

Our perceptions of ourselves can be influenced by emotions, needs, and wants.

If you think you look “fat” or “too big” perhaps that is an expression of your conflict over needs and wants.  Do you feel as if you’re too much for others?   That you want too much?  Do you imagine that you burden people with your needs?  That sense of wanting too much, or needing too much, can be unconsciously experienced as seeing yourself as literally too big.

What do you need that you’re not getting?


What do you want more of in your life?  Love?  Compassion?  Interest?  Friends?  Connection?  Money?  Security?  Safety?  Joy?  Fun?


What’s “too much” about you, and where did you get that idea about yourself?  People who grow up in families in which emotionality is labeled “dramatic” or “oversensitive” learn to dismiss their feelings and think that their emotions are too much.  This can then be expressed in concrete, physical terms  about their size.


If you struggle with disordered eating, the mirror can lie.  What is your truth?


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17 comments:

Lissa said...

I've noticed that I overeat when I feel financially insecure. When I'm in the red in my bank account, that's when I'm attacking my cabinets and putting pop tarts onto credit cards. Thanks for posting this. Your blog keeps me much more grounded than I used to be.

Alyssa said...

I'm heavier-set than most of my friends, and it's hit or miss with me. Sometimes I like myself in the mirror and I accept myself and other times I hate myself for not being able to lose the unhealthy weight fast enough.

Brenda said...

I can relate to that. I also can identify with what it says above about liking how I look in the mirror one minute and then five minutes later-or maybe a few days later-I feel disgusted with myself.

Karen said...

I think I just need to be more patient with myself and I also need to hang around non-judgmental, compassionate people. That kind of support versus put-downs would help me the most.

Julie Anne said...

I'm a person who often feels like a burden to others. That's part of the reason I think I'm such a workaholic right now. It does affect my eating habits once in awhile, but more often than not it affects my work habits.

Trevor said...

I've gotten accused by women that I'm needy just because I'm an affectionate person. I wonder often if I overdo it in relationships and I always feel self-conscious about that. It reflects how I feel when I look in the mirror.

Brad said...

I don't ever remember liking how I looked in the mirror. Even though I have somehow managed to have a girlfriend or two, I just never liked how I look. That might explain why my relationships didn't work out. I feel sorry for the ones I dated now. LOL I have to love myself and feel good about myself instead of depending on how others feel about me.

Stephanie said...

I like how I look more now than I used to. However, I still have my days. I think the writer of this blog post is right. It often depends on how a person feels on a certain day-either about him or herself or about life in general.

Rachel said...

I agree, and I must admit how I feel about myself when I look in the mirror changes from day to day. It's interesting how our perceptions are so different, especially depending on our mood.

Sweatpea said...

This sounds like me in some ways. I've put candy bars and ice cream on credit.

Theresa said...

Self-awareness is definitely fickle. It's very hard to always feel good about our bodies, especially when we haven't reached our weight goals. Still, we have to try to feel better about ourselves.

Melinda said...

This is one of those bad days where I really hate myself. I'm not happy today at all with the way I look.

Nora said...

Sometimes I feel like a burden to others. I also don't like the way I look in the mirror, just about every other day as mentioned in this blog post.

Julie Anne said...

After re-reading this I wonder, 'so now what?' What is the next step in resolving these inner conflicts?

Sarah said...

I've always been fickle about my appearance although I think I unfortunately had more bad days than good.

Maria S said...

I never really thought much about being a burden to others, I was to self obsessed. I have been up and down the scale all of my life and people have loved me all the while. I have found little self acceptance. Today I am focused on my inner strengths that will in time allow me to see my outer beauty, wherever I am on the scale of life.

Dr. Nina Savelle-Rocklin, Psy.D. said...

Thanks to everyone who has commented and shared their thoughts and experiences. I hope that you all are able to see and accept yourselves and find inner peace and happiness on your journey through life.