How To Stop A Binge In 25 Seconds Or Less

Binges happen.  When they do, there is always a reason.  If you're turning "to" food, you're turning "away" from something else.

But what if you just can't figure it out?  You feel the binge coming, like a train picking up speed.  It feels like there's nothing you can do to stop it.

As someone recently said to me, "I know it’s important to identify and process my feelings so I don't eat when I'm upset, but sometimes I’m too stressed out to deal with it. What else can I do when I feel that way?”

If you can relate, you may be accustomed to eating to numb, distract or comfort yourself and don’t know how else to calm down.

Here are some ways to alleviate stress and anxiety by calming your body, centering your mind and stopping the escalation of stress.

Progressive Muscle Relaxation Exercise: Focus on your legs. Make them as tight as you can. Move up your body, tightening your stomach, then your arms. Make fists and keep your muscles really, really tight. HOLD that tension as long as possible, a minimum of fifteen seconds but ideally as long as possible. Then release.

Feel that? You’re probably feeling more relaxed.. The idea of this exercise is that without muscle tension, you can’t access muscle release. When your body is relaxed, your mind will follow. When your mind is relaxed, you won't feel the need to binge. And viola! You're delivering those cookies to a delighted new friend and forming a new friendship, something that will last much longer than the cookies. :)

The Four Senses Exercise: As you know, we have five senses, but if you turn to food when you’re stressed, you’re familiar with the sense of taste and probably use taste – food – as the primary way you self-soothe. The Four Senses exercise puts you in touch with the other four senses and helps you center yourself.

Wherever you are, look around and say one thing that you can:

1. Touch
2. See
3. Smell
4. Hear

Take in these senses with as much detail as possible. You can take this exercise a step further by not only noticing what you can touch, see, hear, or smell, but by indulging one of those senses with calm.
Do you have a favorite song or playlist that puts you at ease? Stick some headphones in and let your mind focus on the beautiful sound. Visit nature and treat your eyes to a feast of plants, landscapes, and beauty. Burn a candle with a scent that is especially calming. Wrap yourself in a warm, furry blanket.

If you want to binge, your subconscious is asking for some love. Give it to yourself -- without food.

When I'm particularly stressed, I turn on my favorite old-school artist, Prince, and dance around my house like I'm on stage. That usually changes my mood. But if you need a little more help, here are some other options:

Visualization. There are two ways to use visualization: the first is to imagine a happy place where you feel safe and calm; the second is to think about something you’re afraid of, and imagine a positive outcome. Keep in mind those four senses as you work through the visualizations!

Visualization #1: Visualize a place where you feel happy. Where are you? Who else is there? Don’t limit yourself to reality; you can go anywhere your mind takes you. In your imagination, what are you touching, seeing, hearing, and smelling? Dwell in this visualization until you start to feel your heart calm down.

When I'm overwhelmed, I visualize being on a calm lake with the sun shining and water lapping the shore. I remember the time I went canoeing and a black swan swam alongside the canoe. I had the most lovely sense of wellbeing and calm. 

Visualization #2: Imagine a situation that makes you nervous, thinking about the best outcome possible. Again, use the four senses to bring this to life. What upcoming situation is causing you anxiety? Whether it’s a job interview, a personal challenge, a blind date or anything else, imagine the very best outcome, visualizing and imaging the four senses.

I used to have an absolute terror of public speaking. I would get so nervous that my legs would shake (I was positive that the audience could see me trembling, which only made it worse. I realized that I was imagining a critical audience, thinking, “Look how nervous she is. Look at those knees shaking!” Meanies.
I decided to imagine an understanding audience full of people who were benefiting from what I was saying, and I focused on how I could help them. Once I did that, my knees stopped shaking for good. And guess what?  Now I love public speaking!

Using these methods to calm down, along with learning to identify and process painful, difficult and upsetting emotions, will help you comfort yourself and find peace with words, instead of with restricting, bingeing and purging, or bingeing.

When you are calm, you don't need food to cope. And that's how we will beat the diet habit!

Which of these techniques resound with you? Try one out this week. Make a goal to try one or two before you head to the kitchen for that extra loaf of bread. Share your successes and failures with me on Facebook. 

If you are looking for online support and community, check out my Kick the Diet Habit program. All members are granted lifetime access to my online community. This is a great online support for people to chat, ask questions, receive encouragement, and reach me directly. You can learn more about the program here or at the link below. You can respond to this email if you have any questions.

This is what one lifetime member of the Kick the Diet support group said about the program: “Thank you for freeing me from 40 years of dieting and living on low-fat foods and sugar-free this and that. We are in Paris and enjoying some very tasty French food, with no inner critic bullying me. Here’s to freedom and living life to the max!”

I sincerely hope that these techniques help you as you continue to work for greater health and happiness. 

Remember, here is always hope! We are in this together.

Want more help to make peace with food?  I offer an online program that you can do in the privacy of your home, at your own pace, to help you beat bingeing for good.  www.kickthediethabit.com

8 Powerful Principles for Transforming Your Child’s (and YOUR) Relationship with Food

Do you worry about your kids and food?  

Lots of people tell me that they're working on their relationship to food and don't want their children to go through what they've gone through.   They ask, "How can I make sure my kids grow up with a different attitude towards food and their bodies?"

I'm thrilled to introduce Maryann Jacobsen, who has the answer to that question and more.  In this guest blog post, she shares how to transform your child's relationship to food - and I think you'll find that her advice applies to everyone, not just kids.

8 Powerful Principles for Transforming Your Child’s Relationship with Food

It can be challenging to raise kids who feel good about eating and their body. The good news is we know so much more today about how a child’s relationship with food develops than we did just ten years ago. Research gives us clues on what parents can do to spare their little ones much of the agony many of us experienced growing up. Unfortunately, this is not common knowledge (yet).

So today, I’m sharing with you tidbits from my latest book about raising a mindful eater, someone who eats for nourishment and enjoyment, listens to their body and naturally eats in moderation. Here’s a summary of the 8 Principles that have the biggest impact:

1. Structure Meals and Snacks at the Table: Serving predictably-timed meals and snacks at a designated place is a lifesaver. Structured meals help children develop self control around food and learn how to manage their hunger. It also means they don’t get in the habit of eating out of boredom, to ease difficult feelings, or because food is there (external eating).

2. Allow Hunger and Fullness to Guide Eating: Once children sit down to those meals and snacks, allow them to decide when they are done eating, encouraging them to listen to hunger and fullness. In one study, young adults who let hunger and fullness guide eating had lower BMIs and less disordered eating than those who didn’t.

3. Neutralize the Power of Goodies: Kids are naturally drawn to what I call “goodies’ due to their growth and development. But all the attention parents give these foods (negative and positive) makes it even worse. For example, using dessert to reward good behavior or taking it away when a child doesn’t behave, only makes goodies more salient. Avoid giving so much attention to these foods, and kids won’t give as much attention to them.

4. Make Nutrition a Rewarding Part of Eating: Research suggests that as children get older they view nutritious food as less tasty than less-than nutritious foods. Instead of nagging them to eat healthy, find tasty ways to include nutritious food as part of your child’s diet and get them involved with meal prep. Let them see how balanced eating (not single foods) enhances what is most important to them (sports, dance, learning, etc.).

5. Put Pleasure at the Center of Your Table: Too often our culture pairs food pleasure with gluttony, while in countries like France work “enjoy your food” into dietary guidelines. Research shows enjoyment is linked to less picky eating and better eating overall. Plus, families with a positive food environment fare better health-wise than those with a negative or hostile food environment.  

6. Teach Body Appreciation: According to a report from the American Academy of Pediatrics, 50% of girls and 25% of boys feel bad about their body’s shape and size. Body dissatisfaction is linked to unhealthy weight control practices that can wreak havoc on a child’s relationship with food. Parents need to open up a dialogue about how children feel about their body, the media’s Thin Ideal, and the importance of self-care.

7. Deal with Stress Effectively: Kids are stressed-out today and surveys show parents often miss it. Teaching kids how to deal with stress is important because it can negatively impact their eating, health, and well-being. Of the utmost importance is what I call the trifecta of self care -- sleep, activity and balanced eating. Uncovering hidden stressors -- and learning to manage them -- is vital, too.

8. Connect with Your Kids: People are hardwired for connection, and children are no different. When kids don’t feel connected to their parents, friends and community, they are more likely to look to other things (food, alcohol, spending) to feel better or glom on to external goals (looks, popularity, grades) to get attention. Making sure we stay connected, even when it’s hard, can go a long way towards helping children understand their value.

Parents who practice these 8 Principles significantly increase the chance their children will develop a healthy relationship with food and their bodies. And what parent doesn’t want that?

Maryann Jacobsen, MS, RD, is an independent author, family nutrition expert, and author of the newly released book How to Raise a MindfulEater: 8 Powerful Principles for Transforming Your Child’s Relationship with Food. You can find out more about her books, blog, and podcast at MaryannJacobsen.com.

The Monster Inside My Head

Guest Post written by John Bukenas

"I have been on a quest to lose weight for over 30 years. And like most people, I’ve tried every diet plan, every lose weight quick pill.  And they would work at first, but nothing stuck.  

You know the deal, lose 25 and gain 35.  Adding 10 pounds a year to your frame can really take a toll on you in 20 years.

In 2011 I was totally out of control.  I was almost 500 pounds, I couldn’t walk a hundred yards without being in pain and out of breath.  

I decide to try again.  But this time it would be different.  I would do research, stay focused, learn what went wrong in the past.  And as usual, it worked. For awhile, but this time the difference was I decided to go public.  I decided for accountability I would start a podcast and maybe others would come along for the journey.

The podcast is a blessing and a curse.  A blessing because of the wonderful people that have come into my life.  A curse because failing publicly is so embarrassing.

Because of my podcast I had lost 108 pounds.  

I learned more about nutrition, and exercise but there is still something out there that I have not figured out.  It’s the why?

Why do I overeat?  Why do I medicate with food?  Why does nothing else I’ve tried not ease the my stress, my negative feelings?

I’ve tried meditation, tapping or Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), journaling.  Nothing seems to work as well as food.  And as I write this I realize how silly it sounds. Because as soon as there was stress and pressure in my life everything I learned went right out the window. So I realized.

There is a monster inside my head.

This monster is killing me and I don’t know how to stop it.  For years I secretly fought it, but it always won.  Because the monster knows me better then I know myself.  If I build a defense, it knows just how to counterattack.  It’s patient, it’s relentless, and after a year of battling It’s won.  I gained all my weight back, I have stopped podcasting.  

Because I don’t have any answers.  I could go on every week and tell you about all the new research that has come out.  I could show you all the great technology there is to help monitor diet and exercise.  And I could interview others who have successful, and how they accomplished their goals.  But that is not why I started the podcast.  It was to come up with answers and a plan to have success.

So I’ve been trying a new plan.

I’m trying to make peace with the monster inside of my head.  It’s not easy, we hate each other.  But my conscious is no match for my subconscious.  I realize I am so mean to myself.  I demand perfection.  If I make a mistake, I really attack.  I say, “I know better, I’m weak, I’m lazy, I’m worthless.”  This attack on myself starts the depression spiral.  Then it starts over again.

I don’t do this with anyone else.  I don’t expect perfection from others because I know it’s unrealistic.

So I’m starting again.  I promise to be kind to myself.  To be understanding.  To forgive my past failures and put it in the past.  To reach out for help when I’m struggling.  And to be there for others who struggle.

Then it hit me.  I realize the monster I’ve been fighting actually loves me.  The monster hates it when I attack myself, it wants me to feel better.  The monster and I just need to figure out how to do that without food.  Because failure is not an option."

John Bukenas hosts the Let’s Reverse Obesity Podcast.

John’s contact information can be found at http://letsreverseobesity.com