How To Silence Your Inner Critic

Are you eating as a way of escaping a loud inner voice?  Do you tell yourself things like:

You're not good enough

You don't deserve to be happy
You're such a loser

Or worse?

Food can momentarily take you away from that internal critic, the part that attacks your spirit and stop you from living your best life.

(Hint:  a quick way of identifying your inner critic is to catch when you talk to yourself in second person "You're a loser" rather than, "I'm a loser")
  

Here's how to silence that mean voice: 

Imagine a mental courtroom.   You're well-acquainted with your internal prosecutor/ critic.  Now, cultivate an internal defense attorney.   

When the prosecutor says you're not good enough, OBJECT.  Then, take the floor and demand evidence for these accusations.   Remember, a judge will tell you:

Feelings are not facts.

Feelings are not admissible as evidence.  If you "feel" like there's something wrong with you, challenge that notion.  If you "feel" like you should be in a different place in your life, challenge that, too.  Give your defense attorney an equal opportunity to be heard.

When the internal prosecutor accuses you of not being good enough, don't accept it as the truth.

Demand that the prosecutor define "good enough" (by the way, that is subjective and NOT a number on the scale).

What criteria form the basis of this accusation?  Is it your weight?  What else?

Present alternative evidence to the court

Think about how you actually live your life.  If you're reading this, there is likely a part of you that is proactive, hopeful and willing to consider new perspectives.  If you have tried and failed many diets, you're not a failure - you're really tenacious.

When you weigh the evidence and judge for yourself, chances are you'll come to a different conclusion than if you only look at yourself from the eyes of a prosecutor.

Stop punishing yourself for crimes you haven't committed.  

Liberate yourself from that inner prosecutor and feel better about yourself, so you won't use food for comfort or distraction or restrict food to give yourself a sense of wellbeing.

Dr. Nina

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https://winthedietwar.com/kick-the-diet-habit-now/

Declare Your Independence From Eating Disorders!

This is the July 4^th Holiday weekend in the United States, when we celebrate American independence.  

Let’s take the opportunity to declare independence from the oppressive ideas, thoughts, and beliefs about yourself that hold you hostage and keep you from the freedom of self acceptance.

Ideas, thoughts and beliefs lead to feelings, which lead to behavior.  

If you think negative thoughts about yourself, you will feel bad, and be vulnerable to using food (whether turning to it or from it) to comfort, numb and distract yourself from those painful and upsetting emotions.  

When your ideas shift, you feel better, and you won’t need comfort or distraction.

Let's challenge those negative ideas about yourself.  List some of the things you think about yourself: (i.e., "I have no willpower... there's something wrong with me... I'm a freak... nobody else does this stuff with food... if people knew the truth, they wouldn't like me"...)

Where do these ideas come from?  Family?  Culture?  Friends?

What qualities about you do you imagine need to change?   Why?

Do you have to be perfect to be lovable and acceptable?

What does “perfect” mean to you?

When you think about self-acceptance, what do you imagine?

Now, imagine that a good friend or loved one has the same "negative" qualities that you attribute to yourself.  Would you think differently of your friends if you found out they were struggling with food?  Or would you have compassion and want to help?)

Declare your independence and liberate yourself from self-doubt, self-criticism, anxiety, fear and anything else that makes you feel bad about yourself or feel unsafe around people.

Practice responding to yourself as you would treat a friend.  You will feel better, and when that happens, you'll be less focused on food, weight and body image.

That's how you declare independence from self-hate and make peace with food!

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Want help declaring independence from binge eating, stress eating and emotional eating?
Join the Binge-Free Babes Project and get started on a path of freedom: https://bingefreebabes.com/

Don't Eat Humble Pie!

Are you too humble?

It's one thing to be humble - to be modest and give a low estimation of your value.

It's another thing to devalue yourself, underestimate yourself or be too quick to point out perceived faults and flaws.

How do you talk to yourself or about yourself?

"I can't be seen in public until I lose weight."

"I'm such an idiot."

"I can't believe I went out with that guy.  I'm a loser." 

Does that sound familiar?  Are you overly humble and self-critical?  When you talk about yourself, are you referring to your physical, emotional, intellectual, or relational self?  

If you only define yourself by what you look like, or put yourself down for perceived deficits, you're missing the whole picture. When you appreciate all your qualities, your view of yourself will change. 

A pie chart is a great way of seeing the whole you.

List the qualities about yourself that have nothing to do with your physicality.  Include things you like as well as things you don't like about yourself:  e.g., smart, funny, creative, warm, compassionate, loving, shy, spirited, zealous, bossy.

Then divide the pie below to represent each of these qualities.

Follow the example and list the qualities about yourself in the following categories:

Emotional                  Intellectual               Relational                  Other (not physical)

______________         ______________       ______________        _____________

______________         ______________       ______________        _____________

______________         ______________       ______________        _____________

______________         ______________       ______________        _____________

______________         ______________       ______________        _____________

______________         ______________       ______________        _____________

______________         ______________       ______________        _____________

Now, divide up the qualities on the pie chart below.

How does it feel to look at this chart?  What do you notice about this perspective of yourself?  What surprises you?   Is your mind conflicted between acceptance and indifference?  Why?

Having a more realistic self-concept facilitates self-acceptance.  When you appreciate who you are as a person, you feel better about yourself.  And when you feel better, you’re less likely to turn to (or from) food for comfort or distraction from uncomfortable thoughts and emotions about yourself.