Top 3 Holiday Tips

#1 - Be a social anthropologist

There's nothing worse than feeling self-conscious over the holidays.  You feel as if you've got a giant spotlight on you and everyone is looking at you, thinking critical thoughts about your weight, appearance or life choices.   Yuck.

The key is to switch the focus.  Consider what YOU think of other people, instead of imagining what they are thinking about you.

When you're observing others, you will be much less self-conscious and feel better overall.   And, when you feel good, you won't use food to escape, soothe or distract yourself.

#2 - Don't "should" on yourself

If you constantly say things like, "I shouldn't have eaten that" or, "I should exercise more" then you're "shoulding" on yourself.   You might eat just to escape your own critical voice!

Instead, acknowledge yourself for what you ARE doing.  Say, "I'm proud that I realize why I ate those Christmas cookies, instead of only focusing on the fact that I ate them."

Be curious, not critical.  Ask yourself, "I wonder what's going on with me?  Am I upset about something or anxious?  What would I say to a friend in the same situation?"

Being nice to yourself feels good.  When you feel good, you won't eat for comfort or distraction!

#3 - Toss the scale

How many mornings have you weighed yourself - and whatever that number is, it ruins your whole day?

The bathroom scale is not your friend.  It does not know you and it cannot measure your value.
Do not let a piece of metal and plastic have that much control over your self esteem!  Toss that scale in the trash, where it belongs.  Or do what I did in this video:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LKbtHooceZI

Please comment on which of these tips resonates the most with you.

Wishing you a happy, healthy (and enjoyable) holiday season!!

Dr. Nina

"The way people think about eating issues is sexist"

Today I'm really excited to share my interview with Ryan Sheldon, founder of Confessions Of A Binge Eater, in which he shares his journey to overcome binge eating disorder.

Here's a conversation I had with Ryan recently.

1.  Ryan, can you share your journey of struggling with binge eating to recovering from the disorder, or as I like to say, ‘liberating’ yourself?

I’ve always been a big eater, going back to childhood, and it seemed normal at that time. I was always a bigger kid, so the fact that I ate a lot didn’t seem unreasonable. Plus, I had a mother who made excuses for my eating habits: She would always say, ‘Don’t worry, Ryan. You're a growing boy.’; and she’d tell others, ‘He’s just big boned.’ So eating a lot was indoctrinated into my life, and my brain. It became normal, and then it became normal to overeat. Then it became normal to think about food all the time, obsess about it, plan meals days in advance, all while binging on fast food, and sometimes really healthy food, in between meals. Food was dominating my life, and not just eating it, but thinking about it non-stop. It’s hard to have a life with all that going.

I have been going to therapy for many years, and when I finally started talking about compulsion it led to me being diagnosed as suffering from BED. Just realizing that BED was real was life changing for me. I wasn’t ashamed any more. Talking about it has helped greatly, as well as knowing that there are many other people who suffer from this. It’s why I started blogging about it. If it helps even just one person it will be worth it.

2.  What has your biggest challenge been in terms of being a guy with an eating disorder?

Convincing people that I really was suffering from one. People just don’t think men suffer from eating disorders, and men don’t feel it’s socially acceptable to talk about it. They think women are the only ones who do suffer or should suffer from an eating disorder, because women are the emotional ones, or less able to control their emotions when they are upset or stressed, and naturally turn to food. 

I remember telling a couple friends that I had BED and they laughed, they thought I was joking. I’m a funny guy and I come across really confident, so for my friends to think that I was having real problems with food was hard for them to understand, or to take seriously.

3.  What are the biggest misconceptions about men and eating disorders?

Well, as I mentioned, people just don’t believe a guy can or should suffer from them. If a man has a big appetite people just say, ‘Well, he’s a guy.’ And if you tell them that you have an eating disorder they think you’re supposed to be really skinny or they think you are joking. They say, ‘You’re a guy, you can just work out and you will lose weight really fast.’ 

The way people think about eating issues is sexist. But eating disorders are emotional, psychological, and can affect anyone. In fact, just about half of those who suffer from BED are men. I think most of the men out there suffering from BED don’t even realize it’s a disease – they just think they are a big guy and probably eat too much. 

Women, on the other hand, are more scrutinized for their appearance and they are much more educated on eating disorder awareness. So they are more open to the idea that they or a friend may have one, and keep a watchful eye for the signs. 

No one suspects a man might have an eating disorder, too.

The result of all this is that men don’t feel it’s socially acceptable to tell anyone they are battling an eating disorder, which causes them to hide their problems even more and prevents them from starting to deal with something like BED.

4.  What misconceptions do you think people have about BED and what do you want them to know? 

They think people who suffer from BED eat a lot at every meal and are extremely overweight. In fact, most people with BED are normal weight to a little bit overweight. They are usually not obese, because, although there is no purging after the binging, there is a kind of dieting after an episode or series of episodes. People also think you are lazy or don’t care, and those are the reasons for your eating disorder. It’s such a problem. 

People need to understand that BED has nothing to do with hunger, it is a compulsive disorder. It can happen to anyone.

Ryan Sheldon is founder of Confessions of a Binge Eater, a blog he created to share about his journey with Binge Eating Disorder (BED). Ryan hopes his story will help others suffering from BED overcome shame and embarrassment, as well as gain back control over food. In particular, Ryan provides a voice for the many men struggling eating disorders while encouraging them to get help.

Ryan used to spend his days thinking about food, planning for it, and indulging in it. For years, he justified this by calling it “emotional eating” until he realized his love affair with food was spiraling out of control. Ryan was diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder, an illness characterized by compulsive overeating. Since then, he has made it his mission to not only overcome BED but to inspire others to do the same.

Ryan is not your run-of-the-mill life coach. With an infectious personality, he uses both humor and education to help others facing adversary. Ryan finds when you add humor to a tough situation, it empowers you to stop feeling ashamed and start taking action. Join him on his journey through life with BED!

For more information on Ryan, please visit http://confessionsofabingeeater.com

or email sarah@sarahrosepr.com.

What drives your binge eating?

When it comes to your relationship with food, does it seem as if you are in the passenger seat, and the driver is completely out-of-control?

I am going to help you identify what is “driving” the behavior of binge eating, and give you the two crucial steps to change, that you can implement right away.

For starters, imagine yourself as a car.  If this seems a bit weird, think about this:  we refer to car “bodies” (why is that?) and we take our cars to the “body shop” for repairs.   

As you travel on the proverbial road of life, keep in mind that you are not alone in the vehicle.  There are usually three basic parts to all of us: the Self, the Critic, and the Soother/Supporter.

·      The “Self” is is the part of you that has needs, wants, wishes, emotions and conflicts.  When you say, “I feel mad/sad/glad/afraid” that’s your “Self” talking.   

·      The “Critic” informs you of all your perceived transgressions.  It is relentlessly judgmental, critical and sometimes downright nasty.  (Hint:  if you refer to yourself in the second person, it is usually the critic talking, as when you say to yourself, “You have no willpower!”).  

·      The “Soother/Supporter” is the part that provides understanding, soothing and support. Often, that’s the part that can show up for other people, but not for you. 

Which of these is in the drivers seat?

Chances are, it’s the critic.

We all need a little bit of an inner critic to make sure we make good choices.  Ideally, that critic should stay in the backseat - or better yet, the trunk!

How does this relate to food issues?

When the critic is at the wheel, it isn’t pretty.  And for many people, the critic strikes exactly when they need the most support. 

That leads to using food for comfort or distraction.  And then the critic is there to judge you (“How could you have eaten that?” or “You failed!”), and the cycle continues. 

If you speak to yourself in a critical way, you feel bad.  And if you don’t soothe and support yourself, you’re likely to use food for comfort or distraction.

Where is the supporter in all of this?  Probably mute.

Here’s what to do:

Step One:  Recognize who’s driving

Does your internal critic remind you of anyone you know?  Who spoke to you (or to others) in that manner?  Where did you learn to relate to yourself that way? 

Is that mean voice really “you” or does it belong to someone else?  A parent, sibling, or teacher, perhaps.

Identify the source of that internal critic.  And, tell it to shush.   It no longer has permission to drive you crazy.  Banish it to the backseat.

Step Two:  Be a friend to yourself

How do you express support for others?   Chances are, you are caring, understanding, helpful and friendly. 

What if you spoke that way to yourself?  Try it!  You’ll see a difference.

Talk to yourself as if you were someone you love.  Be nice to yourself.  You will feel better, and when you feel supported by yourself, you are way less likely to eat.

When you are driven by a wish to be supportive and understanding to yourself, as well as to others, you will stop using food to cope.

And that’s how you make peace with food!

How to Accept Yourself

When you think about the concept of self-acceptance, what “self” do you think of first?  The one in the mirror?   Because there is so much more to you than meets the eye.  

In this video, I'll show you how to find a renewed sense of self-acceptance and feel better about yourself. When you feel good, you won't turn to (or against) food to comfort, numb or express yourself.

Go ahead and WATCH now!

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What You NEED to Know About Comfort Food

Ever wonder, "Why food?" 

Dr. Nina explains WHY you use food to cope and she tells you exactly what you need to do to change. Watch now!

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https://winthedietwar.com/kick-the-diet-habit-now/

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Do You Find This Pretty Annoying?

If you're sick of people telling you that you have "such a pretty face" and if you just lost weight, you'd be dating up a storm, then watch this video! 


If your relationship to food is causing you pain, whether it's bingeing, bingeing and purging, or restricting, there is a reason.  That reason may be out of awareness but it is still impacting you.  


When you figure out what lies beneath, you can take steps to address those underlying emotions and conflicts ('cause it's not just about emotions!!) and take steps to change.


Dr. Nina helps you win the diet war by making peace with yourself.

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https://winthedietwar.com/kick-the-diet-habit-now/

How To Get Rid Of Feelings

Ever wish you could just be DONE with painful, difficult, upsetting emotions?

You can't eat them away, starve them away, purge them, let them go or ignore them.  There's only one way to get rid of feelings.  WATCH NOW to and find our how!

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https://winthedietwar.com/kick-the-diet-habit-now/